Anyone else want to kick being a woman out the window during “that time of the month?” If you’re anything like me you just want to kick something out the window, doesn’t really matter what. When I am hormonal just about everything I say comes out with an unreasonable amount of attitude behind it.
I’m gonna give a shout out to my fellow Country music lovers (You don’t have to admit to it, but I know there is at least one reader out there who wants to play in Texas but doesn’t have a fiddle in the band). When I am in these sort of moods I could sing Terri Clark’s “I Just Wanna Be Mad” with the same conviction as a Sunday morning worship song. I go around nitpicking everyone else’s actions, meanwhile explaining my own behaviors away with all the typical woes of womanhood.
Who do you expect is the easiest target of my hormonal expressions? You got it, my husband. This Sunday was one of those days that I was mad at the world and my poor guy was getting the brunt of it. Just before 10 am, as our son was merely relaying to me the events of the morning, my husband said something that made me stop dead in my tracks. “Caedmon, could you please stop getting me into trouble today?” I am guessing my bottom jaw was about to my knees as my brain replayed the interactions between him and me so far that morning. It appeared that without even realizing it, my tone and subject matter selections had come across as critical. My brain worked it out and concluded, this was my bad!
Oh boy, I was made aware of the effects of my behavior, and I was now faced with a choice. Do I continue to make myself feel better by bringing out the manifestations of my suffering (if you can even call it that) on my husband? Or do I choose to adjust my attitude and change the course of this day? One option required less active effort on my part but the other would result in a much healthier and happier outcome. I chose the latter. My attitude didn’t change immediately, though. In fact, not even 5 minutes later I encountered the need to apologize AGAIN for a reaction I gave to a simple question. Ugh! The frustration.
I was relieved and delighted when my man reciprocated my apology and explanation for my behavior (you guessed it…the “H” word) with understanding, support and forgiveness. It was that interaction that turned our day together around entirely. Sometimes the difference between a good day and a bad day is as simple as a series of choices. The choice between ignoring or acknowledging. The choice between acting or reacting. The choice between pride or humility. The choice between withdrawing or communicating. The choice between letting your body run you or self-control.
I know that for me finding ways to manage PMS would sure help in making the better choices a little easier. Thankfully we are not alone when it comes to the battle against hormones. When I shared the above “PMS fail” story with the Behind Our Doors girls, they shared some advice with me to help prevent similar situations in the future. Take a look at what they had to say…
Suggestions for coping with PMS:
Rachel – “We all struggle with symptoms of PMS to some degree or another. Don’t you wish there was a cure-all for PMS? I sure do. Knowing that we don’t all cope with PMS the same way, I thought it would be great to throw out ideas to see what coping skills have worked for different women as we deal with this monster every month.
- Drink soy milk a few days before your period
- Get plenty of rest…our bodies need it more during PMS
- Watch your calendar and don’t overfill it when you know it’s going to be ‘that’ time of the month”
- “Vitamin B6 50mg 2x a day is great for regulating moods. I take the Solgar brand and have found it to work well.”
- “Vitex (Chaste Tree), is also a great herb to help regulate menstrual cycles.” IMPORTANT: Don’t take vitex (chase tree) if you are pregnant or trying to become pregnant as it could cause a miscarriage.
- “Take a good multivitamin daily. I take MegaFood Baby & Me Prenatal Vitamins and I have found them to help with my moods a lot!”
- “If possible, ask for some quiet time. Sometimes I will say to Jeff – I feel like I’m going to lose it, would you mind if I go upstairs for a few minutes? (This plea doesn’t always come out as calmly as that) – He is usually more than happy to give me a few minutes to gain control of myself (since my family greatly benefits from this!). I usually read my Bible or listen to some music and cry for a few minutes and attempt to find some sanity amidst the internal chaos I am feeling.”
- “Call a friend! Sometimes talking with another girlfriend can help change my mood – just knowing someone ‘gets it’ can really help me.”
Kathy – “I drink red raspberry leaf tea every morning. My husband makes it for me and that helps any day start better, even a PMS day! He makes it in a 4 cup coffeepot and puts in 2 tsps. of red raspberry leaf loose tea and 2 tsps. of loose earl grey tea. I have a great source for getting the loose teas at Jean’s Greens in East Greenbush, NY. They ship everywhere. Seems to keep the sore breasts at bay too!” I have noticed that if I have too much caffeine, it affects my hormones as well so if you are having a particularly rough time, skip the earl grey and just do plain red raspberry leaf.
What helps you maintain self-control when you are struggling with PMS symptoms? We’d love to hear them!
We are sharing what has worked for us. Always consult your health care professional before trying new products, especially if you are pregnant, nursing, or trying to become pregnant.